raeschae | Three Little Words (prompt 09, table 04)

Title: Three Little Words
Author:

raeschae
Character(s)/Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Theme: Theme 04: Lover's Rock
Prompt(s): #09 - Need
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: Of all the things Jensen thought might come between them, this was not on the list.

“I feel kind of special.”

Jensen turns from the sculpture he's been working on to find Jared standing in the doorway of his studio, feet crossed at his ankles, hands tucked loosely into the pockets of his jeans. “Thanks for comin' up,” he smiles, making his way over to greet his boyfriend with a kiss. It's probably never going to get old, referring to Jared as his boyfriend. There's a good chance it'll never stop sounding a little strange, too.

“You think I'm gonna turn down a private invite into your inner sanctum? Dude, I been watchin' this place from the other side of the glass for so long, I was starting to think it only existed in my imagination.” Jared hooks an arm around Jensen's waist, pulling him closer and gripping the back of his neck with a sure hand. “Missed you,” he breathes before his lips press against Jensen's in a greeting that's so much better than a wave or a handshake.

Jensen didn't exactly go anywhere, but he did spend most of Saturday in the city with a friend of Jeff's who owns a gallery in San Francisco. By the time Jared got off of work, Jensen was too tired to be of much use, and Sunday was...well, it was weird.

The entire week was stressful, with Jensen working late every night and Jared obviously dealing with something he's not ready to talk about yet. This morning, Jensen couldn't stand it anymore, so he texted Jared and told him to come by the studio. It's not something he offers randomly – Jeff and Ian are the only other people who have been up here since he started renting the space – but it seems like as good a place as any to have the conversation he needs to have with Jared.

When Jared stops kissing him, he lowers his head to the bend of Jensen's neck and just kind of clings to him. “I love you,” Jensen says against the top of his head, unsure if it's even audible over the low din of the stereo playing in the background.

Aside from his family and Katie, Jensen can't remember uttering those words in his adult life. It's kind of a big deal and, judging by the look on his face when he pulls back, he Jared knows it.

“You what?”

With a shrug and a smirk, Jensen feigns confidence he's not feeling when he repeats himself. “I said I love you. It's important that you know that.”

Jared's expression shifts from confused to concerned. “Why?”

“Because we need to talk.” It comes out sounding a lot more ominous than he means for it to; those words always do.

Instead of freaking out, Jared just takes a step back and runs his fingers through his hair. “Yeah,” he agrees. With a smirk of his own, he adds, “It's important for you to know I love you, too, though.”

Jensen isn't sure why, but he's pretty sure Jared knows what he's going to say before he says it. In the last few months, he's come to like the way Jared seems to get him, to understand without Jensen having to explain himself. This time, though, it's unsettling.

He leads the way further into the studio, but he doesn't know where to sit or stand or what to do with his hands. Everything just feels awkward and wrong. Usually, when he's feeling stressed or worried about something, he stops at the window and watches Jared work for a little while. It's familiar and calms him down like a hug from his mom used to when he was younger.

Jared's not down there, though; he's right here, waiting to hear what Jensen has to say. “So this weekend was a wine and dine.”

With a nod, Jared moves closer and leans against the window. “I kinda figured.” He studies his hands, his brow furrowed, and then speaks without looking at Jensen. “What's the deal?”

“Three installation pieces for this theater he just bought. And a showing at his gallery for the duration of the job.” It's an opportunity most artists in his position would sell their souls for, everything he's been working toward for seven years now. He would be an idiot to turn it down.

Finally, he lifts his eyes to Jensen's face. “How long?”

“Four to six months.” They both know the chances of him returning are slim, no matter how long the job lasts.

Jensen has spent the last twenty-four hours trying to predict how Jared is going to react to this news. He would be lying if he said he wasn't hoping for disappointment or even anger. At least then he would know that Jared is as invested in this thing as he is. Of all the possible reactions he considered, though, sarcastic laughter was not one of them.

Shaking his head, Jared leans his head back against the window, crosses his arms over his chest, and takes a deep breath. “I have an interview with an aerospace company next weekend.” There are no aerospace companies around here, as far as Jensen knows. “It's in DC.”

His stomach drops. It's not fair to expect Jared to be excited for him when he can't return the favor. Rationally, he knows that Jared needs to get out of the coffee shop and start exploring his options. He needs it like Jensen needs to go to San Francisco to do the same. That doesn't make the growing distance any easier to accept.

“So,” Jared finally says, stepping up to rest his hands on Jensen's hips. “What's this mean for us?”

The most honest answer is one that Jensen is not ready to give, so he just he presses a kiss to Jared's throat and says, “I don't know yet.”

No Touching