raeschae | Angst is the Word of the Day

How big we talkin here? Because, I recently made my way through the Quarterback Verse, and, TEARS DOWN MY FACE THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME. Also, this fic (http://alasse.livejournal.com/92358.html) is SO FUCKING GOOD.

And I don't remember how angsty this (http://alasse.livejournal.com/96662.html) is, but it's one of my hands down favorite fics ever.

Also, hi, I love you.

I <3 U 2! (That's you, also - not U2, though I do adore U2)

I've read the QB verse, but I'll check out those others! Thank you, thank you, thank you.

How big we talkin here? You ever have one of those days where you just wanna have your heart broken a little? Not really, I don't want someone to actually break my heart in real life, but to read something that just makes you cry? I don't even know why - it's probably not healthy to WANT to cry.

U22222 ♥ ♥ ♥

I just finished it a bit ago, and I'm sort of obsessed with QB. There was a new timestamp todayyy!!

YES. THAT IS PRETTY MUCH ME TODAY. So I will be trolling the comments to find stories that will rip me to shreds. Also, if you haven't read the fic Elisa wrote for me, you should do it. That was fucking flawless.

I have not - link me?

I keep coming up with these uber-angsty story ideas and then I start to outline them and realize I'd rather read someone else's angst than spend months immersed in my own.

Also, I had a dream about you last night, JSYK.

You probably already found it, but, here! (http://pianoforeplay.livejournal.com/45784.html)

Okay, except, I want to read your angst. I'm pretty sure my life is turning into that ridiculously heartbreaking J2 emo boys comment fic you wrote. :(

Was it an awesome dream? About where we live in a cottage by the sea?

It was a dream where you were making me Cheerios and then water started leaking into our living room from the ocean and we were standing on the couch, singing Katy Perry. Yeah, I don't know, either.

THAT IS THE COOLEST FREAKING DREAM I HAVE EVER HEARD. YOUUUU. ♥

just jumped in to see which recs was given, and I'll have to say that these three recs are all amongst my favs. I think we might have the same taste in fics :-)
Think I need to re-visit these fics soon. :-)

I'm still sleepy so I can't think beyond c_b, SORRY!

Did you finish Look The Other Way (http://candle-beck.livejournal.com/119430.html) yet? Because if you want your heart broken, there you go. Alternatively, if you want something shorter where you just want to hug Sam, there's For Keeps For Good Forever (http://candle-beck.livejournal.com/120742.html).

(Also, I want to see that movie!)

I'll read the second one - I did finish the first one and it was LOVE! I actually really liked the ending of it, too, which surprised me. (The fact that I liked it, that is.)

Also, you should know that sleepiness will not be an acceptable excuse from here on out. Scrape the crusties out of your eyes and be useful to me!

WELL, I'm not sure what else to rec. Oh, wait, I know! fleshflutter, here I come.

(It shows just how much I read angsty fic when there's only two authors I can rec.)

Also, that ending tore me open raw. (Excuse the lame, possibly disgusting idea right there.) I want to hit her but then pat her on the back and then hug her - true story. Gaaah, boys.

In my head, Dean gets in the car and follows. I think maybe I made it a happier ending than it actually was, but it worked for me. ;)

Which FF? I've read half of her stuff - what do you recommend for angst? (Not horror - angst.)

Shush! Don't spoil it for the one person masochistic enough to read it who hasn't yet!

Right - angst is the key word. The ones of hers that stay with me are the more disturbing ones, so horror. Uh. I'm scrolling through her masterlist and the only one i can remember being angsty (as well as kind of horrific) that you may not have read would be This Thing of Ours (http://fleshflutter.livejournal.com/28026.html).

IDK MAN, there's lots out there. I'm just shit at finding it, evidently.

ETA: SUCCESS! If I had died, I would have never felt sad at all (http://fleshflutter.livejournal.com/6264.html) - AR where Dean dies in the fire, not Jess.

Edited 2011-01-10 17:53 (UTC)

I'm not giving anything away! Well, not that you'd understand until you've read the whole thing anyway.

Excellent, I'm adding your Dean deathfic to the list. :(

Awesome. And when you've weeped the bitter tears, you can have one of the cookies I'm making before I hightail it back to my warm bed.

http://community.livejournal.com/super_real/107767.html This is one of the most angsty stories I've ever read! Oh dear lord... prepare to get your heart broken a million times. BUT there is also a glimpse of hope in the end. <3

Thank you for the rec! I'm adding it to the list - I do wanna cry, so I'm definitely going to check it out.

J2, short-ish: L.A. Story (http://kestrelsan.livejournal.com/73408.html) - ~4100 words, maybe not angsty enough? Hrm.

J2 AU, 28k words, *still* my favorite angsty one: Deadsville (http://unreckless.livejournal.com/95805.html) - warning for infidelity, I suppose (and I only warn this because it's the foundation of the entire story). It's amazing though.

J2 AU, 20k words, maybe not angsty enough for your purposes, I dunno, but it gets me every single time: Keepsake (http://indysaur.livejournal.com/24566.html) - the Wall-E AU.

Um, I have tons more, I'm just not sure how far your angst meter goes? :)

At least two of these fics are ones I've looked at before and skipped over. I will definitely be checking them out.

I like angst. I'm not big on anything that crosses into depression territory (i.e. suicide attempts and whatnot), but I like pining, UST, and personal tragedy. I especially love unconventional love stories in the midst of the angst. Not that I'm asking much or anything. ;)

Not quite suicide attempt but Jared is pretty messed up in this one for a little while. Jensen wins the pining contest though, wow. It flew under the radar a bit, this fic, have you read it? And Heartbreak Ensues (http://tinalia.livejournal.com/50943.html) (~75k and really well done, I thought).

I have not read it - but I will give it a shot now! Thank you!!

Rec of And Heartbreak Ensues definitely seconded, I thought it was wonderful. Also, have you been reading Restraint by darkemeralds? She's just posted the last chapter; I cried buckets.

Hi!
Unfortnatly I don`t have an angsty fic to rec you, but I was woundering if I could a link to this Quarterbacks Verse, I have not heard of it before.

Thank you in advance, Marie

Sure. here (http://pianoforeplay.livejournal.com/33394.html) is the link to the master post. It's long, but it's totally worth it!

I know, a good cry can be soooo liberating.
So here is my contribution: http://samdean.archive.nu/viewstory.php?sid=2248
It's a bit different, but really worth a try. And don't miss the second part. You just want to hug everyone (maybe not John, but... yeah).
Have fun and a great week *waves*

I know that feeling, bb, of just needing the emotional release of a cry but not wanting to get it from RL (cause that's never fun, ugh).

A recent fic that made me bawl was You're a real fucking page turner (http://standing-fic.livejournal.com/97277.html). IDK, there was so much ANGST and PINING and it hurt to read but it made me happy in the end.

And if you're in the mood for a beautiful horror story that is both gorgeously written and sob inducing (in sad, appalled tears and happy tears), check out The Light of Munin (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/42091.html). Warning for this one - it is LONG, and it is HORROR, and Sam is NOT A NICE GUY, and there is lots of H before you get to the C, but it's worth it, IMO, if you like those kinds of stories.

Edited 2011-01-11 18:08 (UTC)

just needing the emotional release of a cry but not wanting to get it from RL YES!

I love, love, love You're a Real Fuckin' Page Turner so much! Almost enough to re-read it again, even though I just did a month ago.

I haven't read the other, though, so I'll add it to the list. Quick question: Is it as horrific as her Suite verse? Is that what it's called? I haven't read much by her.

No, it's not as horrific as Suite!verse - I had to stop reading that, because you talk about all H no C. JFC. Shudder. Anyway, don't get me wrong - this story is VERY much in the horror genre (think Clive Barker - it's set in a post-apocalyptic world where monsters have basically overrun the place and Dean has no idea who he is), and there is a lot of non-con and torture, esp. at the beginning, but it's also a story about redemption, and her world building is fascinating and gorgeous. That said, if evil!Sam squicks you out or non-con and tortured!Dean are things you can't read, don't touch it. (Those latter two things definitely squick me out, but I found that unlike Suite!verse, there were some kernels of hope sprinkled in here and there, so I kept with it, and at the end, I was very glad I did.)

Wow, that was long, lol.

ANYWAY, believe it or not, she has written some awesomely happy, cracky stuff, too. The Maui Two Step (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/4002.html) is a totally fun Sam/Dean wherein they go to Hawaii for Becky's wedding and Sam Has A Plan. Sam Winchester and the No Good, Horrible, Very Bad Day (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/29762.html) is ... what it says it is, but made me cry with how sweet it is at the end. Coyote Beautiful (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/557.html) is the start of a little verse wherein Sam and Dean wake up together after a night of drinking and deal with the consequences. And of course, there's Phthonus in Lethe (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/11118.html) and all subsequent fics (except for the most recent - I wasn't a fan of that one) - pretty much the hottest first-time Sam/Dean D/s in the history of the world.

So yes, definitely an author worth checking out - she writes across a broad spectrum of genres, so even though Suite!verse isn't your thing, there might be one of those that is. :D

Wow, I must be approaching the character limit here. ;)

Edited 2011-01-11 18:25 (UTC)

I've read the first two Phthonus fics and I can agree that that one is hot like burning! I didn't realize she had done anything that's not extreme h/c, so I'll check this other stuff out just to experience something different!

Thanks for the recs - it's snowing like WHOAH here today, so we're not exactly busy. It's nice to have something to read and nobody around to see me cry. ;)

I highly recommend Sam Winchester and the no good day, then - it's funny but also pitiful and a little angsty but super sweet at the end. I reread it about... once every two months? I think you'll like it. :D

We're supposed to get a huge dump of snow here tonight and tomorrow. Shudder. I don't do well in the snow - Texas upbringing and all. Sigh.

Living primarily in Indiana and Michigan for most of my life, I'm used to the snow, I guess. Doesn't mean I like it much. I prefer sunshine and summer!

Of course, being snowed in means I can read more blindfold fills and angsty fic in my pj's - so it's not ALL bad.

I think that's my main problem with the snow - I'm not prepared for it. Like, Vancouver doesn't get a lot of snow, so I don't have snow boots or a snow shovel or anything like that, lol. It doesn't seem worth buying all that stuff for snow that doesn't happen very much (last year I think it snowed once but it didn't even stick).

Yay for reading fic in PJs! That sounds wonderful. Sigh. I gotta stop messing around on LJ and get to work.

I don't know if they would be your interest, but she's written two amazingly long and angsty pieces that completely reeled me in: The Bright Lights of Disturbia (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/47893.html) and The Berserker'verse (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/104764.html). Both are very, very dark in places, but there are things to smile about in both 'verses by the end of the long, dark road. Promise.

And right now she's been writing missing scene/tag ficlets for each episode (1-100) that are a mix of humor, heartbreak, and angst. It's called Fumbling in the Dark (http://community.livejournal.com/leonidasden/77336.html) and it will be Sam/Dean eventually, once they figure it out.

And I second, Sam Winchester and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day for something lighter.

Angst is the Word of the Day

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