raeschae | Sweet Dreams (A Disclaimer Verse One Shot)

Title: Sweet Dreams
Author:

raeschae
Wordcount: 1600
Rating: PG
Pairing(s): Jared/Jensen

Summary: When Jensen has trouble sleeping, Jared struggles to figure out how to help him.
Takes place between the final chapter and epilogue of Disclaimer: Sh*t Happens
Prompt(s): Nightmare for

schmoop_bingo

Notes: I said I wasn't going to fill all of these prompts with Disclaimer stuff. So what do I write first? *facepalm*

The room feels like it’s about a thousand degrees when Jensen bolts upright in the bed and narrowly misses sinking an elbow into Jared’s eye socket. He’s mumbling incoherently, angrily, and pulling at his disheveled crimson hair with one hand while punching his pillow with the other.

“Dammit,” Jared growls at his side. He likes to press his forehead against Jensen’s shoulder when he sleeps, but if Jensen gets up at all in the night, he usually forgets that Jared is using his body for support. Jared’s lost count of how many times he’s been awakened by his face smashing into Jensen’s pillow.

Leaning back against the headboard, Jensen grips at his chest and shoots Jared a look that falls just short of apologetic. “Sorry, man. Nightmare.”

He won’t go back to sleep, never does after a nightmare, so Jared grumbles under his breath, but fights to sit up anyway. “Figured,” he shrugs, as though it’s no big deal, but he’s tired and it’s possible that the shrug comes out looking a little more like some sort of spastic dance move. “I’ll be back.”

Jensen will never admit how much he loves Jared’s version of comfort food, but he doesn’t exactly turn it down whenever Jared offers, either. Jared doesn’t even remember how or why he started doing it, but somewhere along the way it became just another thing they do: Jensen gets freaked, Jared gets the ice cream. Like so many things they do, it’s just habit.

It takes him less than five minutes to run down to the kitchen, drop a couple scoops into a bowl, and then bound back up the stairs again. He flops onto the bed with as much grace as he can muster at five thirty in the morning.

“I’m not five,” Jensen reminds him – just like he always does – while he’s lifting the first heaping spoonful to his mouth. “Just a fuckin’ nightmare.”

They don’t talk about how often Jensen has them, or about what he sees in his dreams that freak him out so much. Jared’s never felt the need to know. All that matters is Jensen’s reaction to it, calming him down and letting him know that everything’s fine here in the real world.

Jared licks his own spoon and dips it back into the bowl, accidentally dripping a little of the melting ice cream onto his wrist. “Well, shit,” he says, shaking his head while he chuckles. He’s perfectly capable of feeding himself, but he’s not quite alert just yet.

With a roll of his eyes, Jensen dips his head and sucks the cold droplet from Jared’s arm. “Think you’re so damn sneaky,” he murmurs, nipping at the cool skin.

So maybe he does it on purpose, but Jared’s not confessing to anything and Jensen’s not complaining, so he figures it all washes out in the end anyway. Instead, he just leans back against the headboard and if a little more ice cream falls onto his chest, that’s just coincidence.

Jensen drops his spoon back into the bowl and leans forward, cold tongue dragging flat against Jared’s sternum. “Every fuckin’ time,” he grumbles as he licks his way across Jared’s chest, biting a little harder than necessary at his nipple. “Could just ask me to blow you, but -,”

“Hey,” Jared interrupts, grabbing the back of Jensen’s hair to pull his head back. “Nobody’s forcin’ you to do anything here, asshole. You don’t wanna do it, stop.” He loves Jensen, but sometimes he loves sleep, too. It’s not his fault they’re awake, and he’s not going to take shit for trying to enjoy the fact that they are.

Pulling away from Jared’s grip, Jensen flips onto his back and stares at the ceiling. Jensen prefers doing everything on his own terms, and waking up is no exception. When he’s startled – by someone else, the alarm clock, or a dream – he’s not exactly pleasant. This is different, though. There’s something under the surface of this one that’s burrowing deeper than most.

Grabbing the ice cream bowl from the mattress between them, Jared heads back down to the kitchen. There was a time when he would have been perfectly content to leave it on the table next to the bed until the cleaning lady moved it, but now he’s grateful for the chance to get out of that room for a second.

After five years together, he likes to think that he knows Jensen pretty well - There isn’t much that the guy says or does that genuinely shocks Jared these days – so when something like this happens, when he can’t get a read on the problem and doesn’t immediately know what to do, it sets him on edge. Sophia’s always telling him that it’s not his job to fix the world around him, but Sophia married Chad so even when her advice is good, Jared has no problem discounting it if he doesn’t want to apply it.

He’s a fixer. That’s what he does. He sees a problem and he fixes it. When he can’t, he feels lost, useless, angry, and a lot of other emotions that don’t exactly bode well for anyone in his path.

Staring out the window over the kitchen sink, Jared hears Jensen’s footsteps before he feels the hands around his waist, the stubbled cheek pressed against his back and the cool brush of platinum piercings on his skin when Jensen rubs his face against Jared’s shoulder blade.

“I’m a dick.” His voice is muffled and, when Jared doesn’t disagree, Jensen slides his hands up his torso. “It was a stupid dream. Nobody even died in it.”

It’s such a ridiculous statement that Jared can’t help laughing, his shoulders melting back against Jensen’s. “Go for a ride with me?”

Jensen’s fingernails scrape over his abs and he moans against Jared’s ear. “Woulda been awesome a month ago.” Jensen’s always had a thing for biting Jared’s muscles. Even after five years together, he still loves sinking his teeth into the swell of Jared’s shoulder. “Got a kid sleepin’ up there now.”

It’s not that Jared necessarily forgets that Brayden moved in three weeks ago. It’s more that he forgets what it means to have Brayden living here now. He forgets that he and Jensen can’t stay out until six in the morning, and then come home and fuck each other loud and rough against the hallway wall upstairs. He forgets that he can’t just get up in the middle of the night and head to In-N-Out, especially if Jensen’s out of town – which Jensen totally never needs to know about, since Brayden slept through it and never even realized Jared was gone.

Something occurs to him, so Jared turns to rest against the sink, his arms looped around Jensen’s biceps. “That what the nightmares are about?” Jensen’s response is to lean forward and flick his tongue over Jared’s nipple. “So you don’t wanna talk about it, huh?” he laughs, dropping his arms along Jensen’s sides to weave their fingers together.

With a sigh, Jensen’s eyes drift shut and Jared drops his head back to let Jensen lean his forehead against the hollow of Jared’s throat. “Keep dreamin’ we’re gonna lose him again, or he’s gonna hate us, or we’re gonna fuck him up and shit. Tonight, you washed all your tats off, cut your hair, and married Katie so he could have a normal life.”

Who could blame Jared for laughing? “And my gay ass marryin’ a lesbian is your idea of normal?”

“I will head butt you.”

The threat is empty, but Jared just rests his hands low on Jensen’s back. Bending at his knees, he buries his face against Jensen’s neck and says, “Since when have we ever worried about normal, huh?”

Jensen snorts a little, one hand tangling in Jared's hair. “His life's been hard. He deserves a chance.”

“Hey, look at me,” Jared orders, resting his forehead against Jensen's. “We are not traditional, I'll give ya that. But we're not abnormal, either, Jen. We love each other, and we love that kid. We have a stable home, and we can give him what he needs.” He kisses him quickly and then runs his thumb over the silver stud under Jensen's lip. “She's gonna see that.”

Jensen's always had sporadic nightmares, but this escalation directly coincides with Brayden's social worker visiting for the first time tomorrow. Jared isn't nearly as nervous as he should be – fuck knows he's been through enough of them to know exactly what to expect – but Jensen hasn't exactly expressed any trepidation, either. It's so obvious now that he's been suppressing that, which isn't exactly a surprise, but Jared still thinks he should have put two and two together before now.

Taking a step back, Jensen lets his fingers skim Jared's bare chest. He opens his mouth to speak and nearly swallows his own face in the biggest yawn Jared has ever seen. With a laugh, he runs a hand over the back of his neck and then hitches a thumb over his shoulder. “I'm goin' back to bed.”

Doubting that he'll actually go back to sleep, Jared follows Jensen up the stairs anyway. Jensen's asleep almost as soon as they lay back down, body half-draped over Jared's side. As long as he's relaxed and peaceful, Jared can worry about his own exhaustion later.